I got feedback on my blog and here’s how I made it all workout!

I got the good, the bad and the ugly. The last two are always not pleasant but I found a way to make them all useful and that’s what I want to talk about today. It’s about that moment when you have a new product, plan or pitch ready and true feedback comes back at you hard directly into the soul!

It was late in the morning and I presented my blog’s pitch to friends and family, you know, people who know me from some time now. After my 3 min presentation the feedback starts to build. I mostly listen to take notes and eventually ask questions. Here’s what was happening inside my mind:

  • The blog’s purpose varied across sections so there were multiple value propositions on why to read it. Although the feedback was subjective from each one, it was related to my goal for the blog and so I later went back to update the About and Kard pages. To compare, here are the previous versions: About and Kard.
  • Halfway through the feedback I noticed messages like “you should be more like ____”, or “what works now is to communicate in a way that _____”. That didn’t seem right because it would mean for me to change from an outside analysis instead of one of my own. I did a risky move in the field of feedback: I questioned back, responded yes and no… Until I got one of them to say it “You have social laziness”. We all bursted into laughs, she hit me right in the soul LOL! Because I got her to mention with no filters the fault I make when connecting with someone else. The way I accepted this is to give my inner Mr Miyagi the goal to write charismatically, because it is the way to go beyond my social laziness to start a new conversation with someone.

Because the feedback session brought me down emotionally and mentally is that I was able to use the inertia, like when jumping: you have to go down to jump higher. But I used a criteria, I know it will help anyone giving or receiving feedback. Here it is:

1) Feedback is true when it relates to either my direction towards my goal and when it mentions the way I have behaved. In both cases the feedback is a mirror of what I have not seen and that’s why it is useful.

2) Any suggestions on how to improve that come from the outside are not true change. True change comes from the inside. If I ever start getting these messages I get the conversation back on track about either my goal or my behavior up to now.

3) When feedback is true, I listen, I take notes and accept it. By accepting it I mean I find a way to improve but always from within me.

Why talk about feedback now? Well, there’s a reason why this post, my second post, talks about feedback. Post #0 is about my purpose for my blog, why my blog matters. The only thing it doesn’t have is what I was not aware of when I wrote it: my faults. By making the second step the feedback session I now know my strengths and my weaknesses, and to unite both in the following posts is what sometimes is called: synergy, zen moment, squaring the circle among many other ways of being completely in any moment.

Interestingly it is that I published this post three days after the Chinese space agency landed the Chang-e rover on the far side of the moon. It is very symbolic that the year 2019 started with the first exploration of the side of the moon we don’t see from earth. Often in life we leave the un-known parts of us for later in life. Like exploring this side of the moon at the end of the 2010’s. I love the symbolism of landing the rover on the first days of 2019, because what was left for las is now a priority.